I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
