she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
