it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Randomize
