I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Me too!
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
soo... how was my night?
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
