Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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