that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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