mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
