Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
