just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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