I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
