good thing vaginas are great cup holders
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
His nipple licking is glorious
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