I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
