Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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