dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
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