All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Randomize
