Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Randomize