The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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