It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
