This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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