He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
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