thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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