I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
