wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
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