Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Randomize
