I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
You may now shotgun with the bride
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Randomize
