There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
