I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
