No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
