i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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