No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Randomize