Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize