We should be called the Road Head Warriors
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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