apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
