OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
