I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
