Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
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