she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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