She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
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