..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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