We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
