DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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