you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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