soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
