Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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