i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
