Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I miss vodka workout Fridays
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
