Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
