all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
Randomize
