i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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