She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Randomize
