I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
PANTIES FOUND
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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